Blogathon entry – Karla Jurczakowski “He had a dream”

He had a dream.

A dream to make a better life for his family by working FIFO.

I had a dream too, but mine changed often, so we went for his, being the most constant.

The date should have been enough of a sign for what was in store for us… April 1st 2011. We felt less foolish however; more invincible.

The hardest for me is the special occasions.

We have missed the last 4 of our wedding anniversaries. Officially, we have now spent less anniversaries together than apart.

We’ve celebrated 4 of the 18 birthdays together. Luckily one of those was the birth of his only son. A precious 20 hours later, we were sitting at the airport watching him leave again.

I haven’t had my sweet valentine here for that Patron Saints’ past 3 Day’s either.

I was always a lover of birthdays being a special day dedicated to celebrating that one person and their existence, and anniversaries, rejoicing in a union between two people.

FIFO has changed that for me.

Now, birthdays and anniversaries are very much like Easter… movable feasts dictated to us by a higher power, otherwise known as the FIFO roster.

Each missed birthday brings tears from at least one child, and sorrow from a father who feels mostly out of touch with family life.

I get to run around like a headless chook, wondering what my addled brain has forgotten and trying to jump on any emotional grenades that may land in the meantime.

Luckily, despite buy bactrim uk near online pharmacy klonopin misses, we have been blessed with Christmases together. A time to be a family again and just enjoy each other. A time where the tears shed are normal for kids who are given normal child boundaries. Where the sorrow still exists when he sees what he misses each day, but is softened by the nightly bedtime routine of hugs and idle chit chat.

His dream for us of having more financial security is being achieved. He has enabled me to be there fulltime for our children which only makes me love him more.

Sometimes however, it feels like the cost is too high.

He has missed the first year of his only sons life, watching his milestones from afar, hearing secondhand about his accomplishments and illnesses.

His girls are growing so fast and turning in to the heart breakers we always knew they would be. They’re going to need dad to terrorise the boys that will soon come knocking.

His stress levels need to reduce, his work/life balance needs a serious overhaul, and his wife needs her best friend back.

I have a dream now. To find him a local job. To make sure we are in a position where we can take the drop of income. To get my man back home to his family as many nights as possible.

I helped him achieve his dream. Now he will help me to achieve mine.